Why ADHD isn’t a failure of focus, but First of All, We Named It Wrong
If we named ADHD more accurately, we’d probably call it Executive Functioning Disorder.
Because what’s really affected isn’t attention itself — it’s the brain’s management system: the part that organizes, prioritizes, and carries a goal from intention to completion.
Dr. Russell Barkley calls ADHD “a disorder of self-regulation across time.”
That means it’s not about willpower or laziness. It’s about the brain’s difficulty managing itself — remembering, planning, prioritizing, and staying on track long enough to finish what it starts.
What ADHD Looks Like in Real Life
For me, it often looks like this:
I go downstairs to grab paper towels from the closet.
On the way, I notice the laundry. “I’ll just start a load.”
I realize I need my hamper, so I run upstairs.
No hamper in my closet — I’ll grab one from the kids’ room.
Their room is a mess, so I start tidying…
and just like that, the paper towels are gone from my mind.
This is what Barkley would call a breakdown in executive functioning — particularly working memory and inhibition.
The ADHD brain generates stimulus constantly. Every thought feels equally urgent, so the ability to prioritize collapses.It isn’t that I forget what matters — it’s that everything matters at once.
The Intention Gap
Sometimes I joke that I don’t have an attention deficit; I have an intention deficit.
The thing I intend to do often doesn’t happen — not because I don’t care, but because my brain doesn’t hold intention in place long enough for action to follow.
Here’s why, in Barkley’s terms:
- Inhibition (the pause button) is weak.
The brain struggles to stop reacting to new information long enough to protect the original goal. - Working memory (the mental whiteboard) fades quickly.
The thought “get the paper towels” is replaced by “laundry,” “hamper,” “mess,” “schedule,” before I can complete the first step. - Prioritization (the organizing function) is inconsistent.
Without a reliable internal system ranking tasks by importance, everything feels equally immediate — and the mind ping-pongs accordingly.
So the intention collapses under the weight of constant new input.
Time Blindness: Living in the “Now”
Barkley also describes ADHD as a disorder of time. He says people with ADHD “don’t live in time — they live in the now.”
Time blindness means there’s no steady internal sense of duration or sequencing.My husband feels time the way most people feel temperature — effortlessly, without thinking. For me, time is something I have to look for.
It’s as if the brain’s internal clock — regulated by prefrontal and cerebellar networks — ticks unevenly.
When those executive circuits are under-activated, the feedback that tells you “ten minutes just passed” or “this task will take half an hour” is glitchy. So I can lose hours or underestimate how long things will take.
It’s not irresponsibility — it’s neurobiology. Barkley explains that the prefrontal cortex uses time cues to organize action; when those cues are weak, behavior becomes anchored in the present rather than guided by the future. The ADHD brain doesn’t feel time until it’s urgent.
And the more steps a task hides inside itself, the harder it is. Each sub-task is another doorway for distraction.
Take wrapping Christmas gifts.
I love the idea of wrapping gifts — imagining my kids’ faces on Christmas morning, picturing the sparkle and joy.
That emotion tells my brain, “This will be fun, so it must be easy.”
Excitement translates into ease, not effort.
A neurotypical brain might register, “This will take hours — scissors, tape, paper, labels, cleanup.”
Mine doesn’t feel that until I’m surrounded by paper at midnight, wondering again how this took so long.
Emotion becomes my metric for difficulty, and emotion lies.
For someone with ADHD, feeling good about a task makes it seem quick, when in reality, the number of steps determines the effort — not the feeling attached to it.
Sticky Notes and Alarms: Building External Time
Because my brain’s internal clock is unreliable, I’ve had to create external ones.
Sticky notes have become my best friends — seventeen of them currently wallpaper my office, each one a thought I didn’t want to lose.
But the moment I walk away, they lose power; out of sight, out of mind.
So I’ve learned to use alarms.
If a task connects to time — a meeting, a reminder, a deadline — it goes in my phone with alarms at a day, an hour, and fifteen minutes before. Otherwise, too many thoughts will fill the gap and the original intention will vanish.
This is Barkley’s principle of externalizing executive function: when the internal system falters, you build it outside of yourself.
Lists, alarms, visual cues — these become prosthetics for the mind.
Why the Brain Works This Way
From a neuroscience standpoint, the prefrontal cortex, basal ganglia, and cerebellum form the network that allows us to pause, plan, and persist.
In ADHD, this circuitry develops more slowly and communicates less efficiently. Dopamine and norepinephrine — the brain’s chemical “signal strength” — run low, so tasks without immediate reward lose momentum.
Without enough dopamine, the future doesn’t “light up.” That’s why urgency, novelty, or emotion suddenly make focus possible — they temporarily flood the reward system and activate attention.
So the ADHD brain isn’t inattentive; it’s interest-based. It needs stronger signals to stay engaged.
Understanding This Changes Everything
Understanding this reframes everything.
It turns self-criticism, confusion, and frustration into acceptance and compassion. It turns “Why can’t I just do it?” into “My brain needs help doing it.” And that’s not failure — that’s design.
Structure, alarms, accountability, and prayer rhythms aren’t evidence of weakness; they’re evidence of wisdom. They are how we cooperate with the acceptance of this handicap — by externalizing what our internal systems can’t reliably hold.
The Christian life is, at its core, about remembering and returning. ADHD just makes that dependence visible — a constant invitation to humility, humor, and perseverance.
If you have ADHD, you’re not alone. And I promise there is a way to understand it, to even love it. If you are struggling with the ADHD in your life, I want to invite you to the newest CatholicPsych Facebook Group, Catholic ADHD Group. We’re building a community around this particular suffering. I hope you will join us.
God bless you,
Teresa Violette